Wednesday, July 14, 2010

RIP Captain Phil


I started watching the Deadliest Catch it's first season. I remember flipping through channels looking for something to watch. I passed the Discovery Channel and I heard "I'm a cowboy. On a steal horse I ride.." and I had to watch what was gonig on because I loved that song. (I was going through a Bon Jovi phase.. don't judge)
The weird thing was that it was about crab fishing in Alaska. I have always had this odd fasination with Alaska, so I had to keep watching. And it was interesting. Watching these men do the most dangerous job in the world. It was so cool. My teenage brain looked for really hot guys, unfortunately not finding one. They're not the most handsome of men, but they worked hard and I really like all of the. One in particular was the captain of the Cornelia Marie, Phil Harris. I liked the way he was so honest and so aggressive. He was an amazing fisherman and he was a good captain. I could tell that just by watching two episodes.
Five years later and I'm still hooked (ha, get it? fishing.. hooked.. whatever). I got my parents and my sister watching it (along with Ghost Hunters, I just have awesome taste) and some of my friends too. Over the years, I really grew attached to those rough and rugged men on those crab boats in Alaska. I followed them on Twitter, read their blogs. I felt as if I knew them, you know? That probably sounds really lame, but it's true. I watched every new show. I couldn't afford to buy the seasons, but Discovery ran enough reruns that I probably watched each episode several times.
In January, I learned from CorneliaMarie.com that Phil Harris had a stroke. I was devastated. I couldn't believe it. My favorite captain, the one who has concured health problems in the past, had experienced something extremely serious. I immediately called my mom and she worried right along with me.
I constantly checked the websites every day, looking for any sort of update on Phil's condition. Then that fateful day in February, I learned that Phil Harris had passed away. I couldn't believe it. I didn't cry. I called my mom again and she was shocked. Phil was getting better, how could this have happened? I told her I didn't know and that I was really sad too. I couldn't talk to loudly though, or cry, because I was in the library.
I got back to my room and immediately turned on the Discovery Channel. There at the bottom, scrolling along with screen, was the announcement that Phil Harris had passed away due to complications of a stroke. I couldn't believe it.
The past couple episodes of Deadliest Catch have been so sad. I don't think I've ever cried that much while watching a TV show before. We watched the crew of the Cornelia Marie discover Phil in his room, suffering from a stroke. We were there when was taken to the hospital, with Jake (his son) along with him. Josh (his oldest son) stayed on the boat. He thought that's what his father wanted. I seriously was bawling the whole time. I didn't know if I could keep watching this show right then, I was so sad. The worst part (until last night's episode) for me was when Josh had to inform the rest of the fleet of Phil's stroke. Those guys are all such good friends. It hit them hard. I've never seen Sig Hansen (captain of the Northwestern) show such emotion, throwing his walkie talkie thingy into his desk.
We were there when Phil had half of his skull removed to relieve pressure. We watched Jake fall apart, getting drunk and yelling at his brother. We watched Jonathan Hillstrand (c0-captain of the Time Bandit, my second fav boat) console his good friend's boys and talk sense into them. Last night's episode was so sad. We watched Jake admit himself into rehab. One of the saddest parts was when Phil told Josh he hadn't been a very good father. While I write this, I'm almost tearing up thinking about.
The episode ended with Phil's death. After the Catch with Mike Rowe (I happen to have a very large crush on that man) was dedicated to Phil. Keith, Sig, Andy, Jonathan, Jake, and Josh gathered around that table and just talked about Phil. I think that made me cry more than the Deadliest Catch episode. Listening to them share their stories of the man I've watched on TV for 5 years was awesome.
I know this kind of sounds lame and I'm sorry. But Deadliest Catch is my favorite show on TV (next to Glee anyway) and Phil Harris was my favorite captain on my favorite boat. I loved watching him captain the Cornelia Marie, loved watching him teach his boys how to be great fishermen, and men in general. I'm currently looking for Cornelia Marie t-shirts for me and my mom.
Next week's episode will be sad also. Watching the guys learn the news of Phil's death might actually be harder than watching Phil die. I'm glad we weren't there for that.
Watching other people cry makes me sad, and these guys are not cries. To see them break down might make me break down.
I'll need a box of tissues and something to cuddle next week.

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